I will preface this by saying I am not making a political statement, but an observation of a lowering of standards in society in general.
Have you noticed there seems to be a deliberate coarsening of language on TV? Words that a well-mannered adult would never have used in mixed company are now used, with a smirk, by panelist and hosts. Why?
At one time, men who had serious disagreements fought duels. There were rules of engagement – instructions. “Pistols at dawn in the garden.” Not an ambush in the drawing room. In an odd way, our forefathers were showing good manners.
When you read Picketing The President, on page 172 you will find Mary Nolan, her granddaughter Delia, and Florida Senator Duncan Fletcher walking down the concourse in the train station in Washington, D.C. Mary Nolan and Senator Fletcher were long-time adversaries. We eavesdrop as Senator Fletcher joins the ladies.
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“Good evening, Mrs. Nolan. It’s a pleasure to see you and your charming granddaughter.” He tipped his hat.
“Good evening, Senator. Are you taking the train to Jacksonville?”
“No, I’m afraid not. I came down to make sure you were having no problems leaving. You know I like to do all I can for the people I represent.” His blue eyes twinkled as though he and Grandmother were sharing a private joke.
“Oh, I know why you’re here. You want to make sure we are on that train and out of Washington. You don’t fool me for one minute,” rejoined Grandmother.
“Well, I must say, Miss Nolan has made things in my office a little livelier than usual. I don’t recall any other young woman calling and being so impertinent. If she is that demanding now, heaven help me if she gets the vote.”
“Not if, Senator, but when,” I said, boldly joining the conversation.
“You may be right, Miss Nolan. Only time will tell.”
The Senator offered Grandmother his arm, and they continued their conversation as they walked.
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Despite their conflicting relationship, Mary Nolan and Senator Fletcher maintained a civil attitude toward one another.
Senator Fletcher tipping his hat and offering his arm and Mary Nolan graciously responding. Exhibiting good manners.
What would opponents do today in the same situation? Have we lost the “social graces” that helped smooth the rough situations?
Good manners should be the rule for social, business, and political engagement.
When my children were in kindergarten, there was a saying they were taught. “Two little magic words that will open any door with ease.
One little word is ‘thanks,’ and the other little word is ‘please’.” Simple but direct.
Do you remember the story of the gentleman who took off his cloak and laid it over the puddle so the lady could step on it and avoid soiling her shoes? Ah, the age of chivalry!
Good manners, used by women and men in social, business, or political settings, make life so much more pleasant for all.
And remember there may be young ones watching. What kind of example are we setting for them?
Class dismissed.
Mary Nolan Brown